Good Friendships

In the last devotional, I shared about evaluating our friendships based on scripture to ensure that they do not become toxic to us or those around us. In this devotional, I am going to share the characteristics of good friendships that can fulfill God’s purpose in our lives.

Be a good friend

A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24

Sometimes people pray for years for good friends, but they seem to struggle finding one. They have a good idea as to what they would like to see in a friend, but somehow it doesn’t translate into reality. If people evaluated themselves based on the criteria they set for others, they would be in a better position to find and/or attract the right kind of friend!

If we are looking for a giving and available friend, then we need to be giving and available. If we value reliability and consistency in a friend, then we can’t be flaky with others. If we desire to have a trustworthy friend, then we need to be trustworthy by being honest and forthright.

Purity of heart

He who loves purity of heart And has grace on his lips, The king will be his friend. Proverbs 22:11

A King will have to be choosy in picking his friends for there will be many drawn to him for wrong reasons. The type of friends a king chooses for himself will have some important and valuable qualities that we can learn from.

A king appreciates someone who loves a pure heart because that kind of person chooses not to have ulterior motives. A person with a pure heart is determined not to manipulate the king because of his/her proximity to the king!

The scripture in Matthew 5:8 states,

“Blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God.”

A person with a pure heart has an intimacy with the Lord that others don’t have. These individuals are more focused on pleasing God than pleasing men; this would include not flattering the king. What you see is what you get with the pure in heart; there is no duplicity in them. Additionally, people with pure heart can see and hear the Lord clearly, and they are not afraid of being the bearer of unpopular news. As a result, they are trustworthy because they are not politicking for king’s favor!

Grace on the lips

People who are pure in heart don’t busy themselves with talking badly about others for they are gracious with their words. You don’t sense bitterness or criticism in their conversations. They are hopeful people.

My Grandmother was a woman who had grace on her lips. If we were upset with someone, she would never marginalize our feelings, but she would not nurture our offenses either. She always hoped and believed the best in people, and as a result her words about others were gracious.

Gracious words are important to anyone and especially to a king who carries a great burden and responsibility for the well-being of others. A good and courageous king wants to know the truth at all times. However, it is more palatable to hear it from someone who can handle bad situations with great grace. A friend who uses soft words to calm a tough circumstance is very valuable. Gracious words maintain the respect and honor of the king in times when he may be pressed from different directions.

A person who has a pure heart and gracious lips has integrity in delivering truth in such a way that it is not offensive but effective in benefitting the king as well as the kingdom. That’s the kind of friend that anyone would love to have in life!

Praise God for good friendships that become a conduit for a worthwhile change and maturity in our lives!