I don’t think there is anyone on the face of this earth who has not experienced rejection. Rejection entered our world when Adam and Eve decided to sin. The fear of punishment and rejection came upon them because they rebelled against God. Up to this point, Adam walked with God and he had a close relationship with the Lord. However, after the fall things changed. Adam and Eve hid themselves from God. They were ashamed of being naked. Adam rejected God’s design and blamed Eve’s defectiveness for his wrongdoing, and God cursed Adam and Eve and drove them out from the Garden, so they would not eat from the Tree of Life (See Genesis 3).
Definition of Reject according to Strong’s Concordance:
(Hebrew 3998): refuse and despise.
Greek (G114) to do away with, to set aside, disregard, to thwart the efficacy of anything, nullify, make void, frustrate.
Rejection comes from different sources. Most of the time, our rejection has come from family members and friends. Those who are supposed to love and accept us can create the most damage. At times, we reject ourselves because of what we have done or our character flaws. Sometimes, we may feel abandoned by God because we turned away from Him or those in authority over us misrepresented Him.
According to Dr. Neil Anderson (from his book Victory Over the Darkness), we react to rejection by: beating the system, giving in to the system, or rebelling against the system. Each of those approaches bring about more rejection, and we continue the cycle of rejection until we become aware of our behavior.
Beat the System
So Rebekah spoke to Jacob her son, saying, “Indeed I heard your father speak to Esau your brother, saying, ‘Bring me game and make savory food for me, that I may eat it and bless you in the presence of the Lord before my death.’ Now therefore, my son, obey my voice according to what I command you. Go now to the flock and bring me from there two choice kids of the goats, and I will make savory food from them for your father, such as he loves. Then you shall take it to your father, that he may eat it,and that he may bless you before his death.” Genesis 26:6-10
Those who beat the system develop a very competitive nature, and they try to control and manipulate people to get their way. Jacob was an example of someone who continually beat the system. Jacob’s mother already had a prophecy that the older was going to serve the younger (See Genesis 25:22-23), but that did not stop Rebecca. She and Jacob plotted to deceive Isaac to ensure that Jacob was going to get the blessings of Esau.
Those who want to beat the system focus on reaching their goal with no regard to how they achieve it. Their achievement makes them feel significant and honorable. However, when their lies and manipulation are exposed, they feel fearful and ashamed. This begins the cycle of more deceit and manipulation, so they can regain the respect and acceptance of others. This kind of behavior brings about great rejection from family, friends, and coworkers because no one likes to be cheated or deceived by others.
If we desire not to be rejected, we have to do the hard work of recovery. We have to say no in desiring to impress others or striving to gain their attention. Once we recognize that we have believed a lie, we must renounce the lie. We need to ask the Lord for forgiveness for trying to create false acceptance through competition, backbiting, manipulation, or control. He is faithful to forgive us and give us new chances.God’s acceptance of us is far more valuable than any sense of identity we receive in trying to beat the system or impressing others.
