The Lord has designed us to be relational and at the same time develop healthy boundaries around those relationships. We develop great relational problems when we don’t honor and respect our boundaries or the boundaries of others!
How do boundary-less people operate in relationships?
But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days.People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good,treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires,always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth. 2Timothy 3:1-7
Some boundary-less people are passive/agreeable. They don’t honor their own boundaries and allow others to mistreat them, take advantage of them, and use them inappropriately. They continue to compromise their own honor and personhood because they haven’t learned to say, “No”, or they are afraid of losing relationships.
For example, some women can give themselves over to men for the desire to receive love, and they continue to compromise their bodies and soul in order to have a man’s attention/acknowledgement. This may be sexual or asexual. One may be agreeable with those things that are not the truth. While they may get a man’s attention for a while, he will not respect and honor her. This eventually causes hatred, bitterness, and resentment in the heart of the woman who has given herself to another man without proper boundaries. Women begin not to honor and trust themselves because their body and/or soul have been violated over and over again.
Another group of boundary-less people are controlling/dominating. They have no problem stepping into someone else’s boundary and telling them how they should run their lives. They are overconfident and intimidating. They will make it known subtly that if people don’t acquiesce to their expectation and demands, they will withdraw love or privileges. The greater authority or position the person has, the more dangerous and insidious this becomes because they can take the voice of God in a believer’s life! Some people can be a mixture of being agreeable to a few and dominating to others.
Some of the examples of boundary-less problems are: Parents trying to control their adult children, in-laws interfering in the affairs of their children’s marriages, spouses being domineering and expecting “their way or the highway”, employers having unreasonable expectations of their employees, and spiritual leaders misapplying scriptures in order to control people’s behavior and/or righteousness.
Identify boundary-less relationships in your life, and ask the Lord to show you your part in it.
“How do we develop healthy boundaries?” is the subject of my next devotional.
4 thoughts on “Boundary-Less People”
Tim
Great article Karline! Many will also find they can be a little of both passive and domineering. Knowing our identity in Christ will help Us put on the brakes if we fall into either tendency. The Holy Spirit will guide Us into healthy relationships and help Us stay in our lane. Often if We are doing either tendency it is because We are not focused within on our own relationship with God, then We will jump the fence and go out there and damage others or try to correct them and walk in an unhealthy way.
Wow, I am on the same track….. The enemy stole some years of growth in my life, because I focused so much on the outside and not inward. I think this is so helpful to so many people!!
Unfortunately most of have done the same in the past! Now we want to recognize it and not allow it to hold us bondage to the old patterns but with a different facade.
Great article Karline! Many will also find they can be a little of both passive and domineering. Knowing our identity in Christ will help Us put on the brakes if we fall into either tendency. The Holy Spirit will guide Us into healthy relationships and help Us stay in our lane. Often if We are doing either tendency it is because We are not focused within on our own relationship with God, then We will jump the fence and go out there and damage others or try to correct them and walk in an unhealthy way.
Thank you Brother Tim! You are very right. That’s part of the my next devotional!
Wow, I am on the same track….. The enemy stole some years of growth in my life, because I focused so much on the outside and not inward. I think this is so helpful to so many people!!
Unfortunately most of have done the same in the past! Now we want to recognize it and not allow it to hold us bondage to the old patterns but with a different facade.